Roll With It, Baby

Sometimes life IS too much or it certainly feels like that to me.

We lose someone too early while someone goes on in endless suffering or merely existing. A big bill comes in or your car breaks down. Your dog gets sick, money gets tight or someone you love hurts you. It happens. This is life after all.

My family and I have been going through a difficult time lately. This past month or more for sure… actually this whole year has been interesting. We lost my dear Aunt Lyn much too soon and several other family members are struggling with health issues.

I was standing at the kitchen sink, breathing through upset over one thing or another when I heard in my mind clear as a bell, “When life is too much, roll with it, baby.” Thank you, Steve Winwood.

Awwwwwwwww…. I remember. Yes and Thank you.

I can roll with this. I can soothe myself over what’s happening and hold the vision of peace, health and happiness for myself and my family.

It’s not always easy to remember to roll with it.

Hell, sometimes, it’s not even easy to roll with it when you remember to.

But, just remember that you CAN roll with it. Rolling with it is ALWAYS a possibility.

Rolling with it opens up avenues that resisting it shuts down.

Rolling with it relaxes your mind and allows you to see the potential positive outcome instead of staying focused on the crappy situation you’re having to deal with. Rolling with it keeps you moving while blaming or complaining keeps you stuck.

There have been more than a few times in the past month I’ve wanted to raise some serious hell and fight. I wanted to cuss and yell and be ugly. I didn’t. But, I really wanted to.

It wouldn’t have helped. I was mad at life and hurt about things I couldn’t control. It would have made me feel worse than I already did. I’m proud of myself for being grown, for remaining calm and keeping myself under control. I haven’t always done that.

I know I and my family aren’t the only ones going through difficult times.

If you’re struggling right now, hold on.

Everything is always working out for us. If things don’t look the way you want them to, keep breathing and wait. What’s that saying about (insert your state here) Texas weather? If you don’t like it, just wait 5 minutes.

In the mean time, I know those 5 minutes can feel like an eternity. I really do understand. But, the more you breathe and soothe yourself in the moment the better things will work out. Truly. You keep moving forward and taking the action you need to take, but do it from a place of centered calm. Big belly breaths will help you get there. (In through your nose, filling your belly first, out through your mouth.)

I am sending you love and soothing and peace and so much more ease and flow than you may have been experiencing lately. This too shall pass. Keep breathing. You’re doing great.

By the way… it’s Friday.

Ladies and Gentleman, Steve Winwood…

The Key to Self Awareness

Awareness is like the sun. When it shines on things, they are transformed. ~Thich Nhat HanhSelf awareness is a vital key to your ultimate freedom. Why do we do what we do? What causes us to take the action and make the choices we make? Or to maybe NOT take the action we know we should take?

Being able to self reflect and really know why we do what we do is imperative to our creating the change we want in our lives and world.

So what’s key to being self aware? Honesty. Not with someone else, but with you. Yep, being honest with yourself is imperative to self awareness. We can fool a lot of people and we spend an awful lot of time trying to fool ourselves, but as is usually the case, honesty is the best policy.

When we’re honest with ourselves about what we’re really feeling we can get to the heart of the issue. How many times have you found yourself upset with someone or something only to realize later that your level of upset didn’t really match the offending situation? Or maybe you were upset with the wrong person!

Each of our emotions are layered like an onion. The core of it was the first time you ever experienced the emotion. Perhaps you picked up the energy from a parent or other family member, maybe something upsetting happened to you, or both. From that first moment until you release it and allow the energy to move, that emotion continues to attract layer upon layer through each similar experience in our lives.

What you feel majorly upset about today is actually the extension of an emotion that many times started years ago.

When we know this we are able to see how we can sometimes over-react to small situations. They sure don’t seem small in the moment, but that’s because it carries with it years of upset, injustice, resentment, anger, fear, hurt or worry. That’s not to say that all situations are small. It’s just an opportunity to recognize that no matter what the circumstance we can respond differently.

What’s currently “wrong” in your life? What are you upset about?

You already know what it is. It’s that thing you think about all the time that makes you feel terrible. (When you think about it, where do you feel it physically in your body? Stomach, heart, throat, lower back, neck?)

Your weight, anxiety, your or a family members nagging health issue, money, your child, your aging or ailing parents, relationship issues, grief, your inability to get pregnant or an upcoming meeting/appointment/event.

Maybe it’s something that’s happening to another person or a situation you have no control over. That’s OK too. Your newly expanded self awareness will help you in finding clarity.

Ask yourself what’s at the core of my feeling about this situation? Do you feel responsible for fixing it? Do you feel like you should have done something to prevent it? Are you angry at the person you’re worried about? Let yourself explore your emotional feelings around the struggle. Allow yourself to get familiar with how you honestly feel.

Ask yourself what’s really going on? What started this? What’s this really about? When was the first time you recall feeling this emotion? Do you feel scared, mad, overlooked, overwhelmed, unworthy or not good enough? Regardless of your answers, it’s OK. Everything is always working out for us, no matter what it might look like right now.

Let yourself ask the questions and then relax. Don’t rack your brain trying to figure it out. It’ll come up easy enough, and if it doesn’t don’t force it. Notice where you feel it physically and soften around it. Tell yourself you’ll think about it later, but right now you’re just going to be. Breathe deeply and give yourself some mental and physical soothing and support. As you move through the physical energy, your mind will have access to more positive perspectives and ideas.

self-awareness_george-a-sheehan

When you become truly aware of your own thoughts, feelings and actions a picture of your life will emerge. Things you struggled over or wondered why about will suddenly come clear and you’ll have a better grip on what you want and what you need to do to get there.

Control: Who Has It & How To Take It

You Are Free To Be HappyHappy 4th of July! Independence Day for us here in the United States.

in·de·pend·ence
[in-di-pen-duhns]  noun

1.  Freedom from the control, influence, support, aid, or the like, of others.

While we in America enjoy many freedoms we don’t always realize how free we actually are. Even people who live in nations with far less freedom than we, have the same capabilities to experience a kind of freedom that isn’t given or allowed, but taken.

Many don’t realize how much control they have over their own lives. Yes, even you have complete control over your life and all that swirls around in it.

What’s that? You don’t feel like you’re in control? You feel like you’re at the mercy of your boss, government, family obligations, money limitations or health issues? It’s OK. Many do until they realize that isn’t actually the case.

Our focus, energy and vibration control our reality.

What we focus on expands and we get what we generally expect.

Governments, religions, teachers and parents all create rules for us to abide by, but only you control your thoughts. You think thoughts all day long that no one else knows about or has any control over.

YOU are in control.

It may not feel that way if you have a busy or racing mind that’s constantly running between what’s wrong, what’s not done and what’s still left to do. If this is the case for you, I want to acknowledge you. Bless all of our hearts.

Our minds are negatively focused, and will be until you take the steps to begin to turn it around. You have that power and that control. You just have to exercise it.

I heard someone say the other day, “that’s just the way I am.” I hear ya. I have said that many times myself.

But, it doesn’t have to be the way you are. You can change. Everyone can.

The things I used to say “that’s just the way I am” about were generally things I wasn’t proud of and that didn’t bring me joy or make me a good and happy person. For instance, being impatient, judgmental, superior/self righteous or holding grudges for years longer than necessary.

We’ve all felt these things. We’re human.

Welcome to the human race!

But, the beautiful part of being human is that we’re in control. We are where we are evolutionarily speaking because of our ability to change our minds. To think of and see things from another perspective.

The best way to change a negative perspective is to release the stressful energy that’s causing it. Notice when you’re feeling bad/mad where you feel it in your body. Set aside your very good reason for being so upset, resentful or afraid and let yourself be with what you’re feeling physically in your body.

That physical sensation in your stomach, back, knee, chest/heart, throat or jaw is what keeps those old emotions present in your body and mind. But, if you can stop telling yourself that old worn out story that keeps bringing the anger and resentment back up you’ll have an easier time releasing it.

It’s actually not difficult at all. It’s a very simple process that works every time to help you to relax and release the ever present stress you feel in your body.

And, what’s better than that? When you release the stress, the situation changes.

You find you’re not so angry, upset or worried anymore and then you suddenly realize or see another view point that was previously unavailable to you. The person, situation or just the thing you needed shows up in perfect time.

But, if what you want doesn’t happen immediately, don’t get discouraged. Learning to exercise control over our own lives and emotions will take some practice. After all you had to crawl before you could walk, right? Anything worth doing takes a bit of your time and effort. Especially if it will change your whole life, don’t you think?

“We’ve had a great first half. Now, what’s important is who’s gonna handle their emotions.”
~Gregg Popovich
Coach of San Antonio Spurs, 2014 NBA Champions

Who’s gonna handle their emotions?

This is the cornerstone of control, in your daily interactions and your life. And how do you control your emotions? By moving the stress energy physically in your body when it comes up.

At first you might have to walk away or stop and count to ten or breathe ten deep breaths, do that. It’s always worth it.

The person who control’s their emotions, is in control. Always. Notice the next time you see someone throwing a fit or acting out of anger. Recognize how out of control they are. In the midst of this you can breathe through any upset and have a calming and centering effect on the situation.

So, if you want more control over your life, begin to control the small things you can control. Firstly, your thoughts and emotions. As you practice and get better and better at it, you’ll notice a huge shift in the world around you. Possibilities and opportunities present themselves and things you’ve been concerned about will begin to take care of themselves.

Sending you much soothing, peace, ease and flow on this day of our great nations independence.

Now get out there and control yourself!! 😉

Love and blessings for a safe and happy week-end,
Crystal

Photo Credit: Be What’s Possible FB Page – Thank you!

What’s Right?

Spring Lake, San Marcos TX

What if we spent more time asking each other, “What’s right?”

What if we began looking at every situation in our lives and asking ourselves a question that would serve us rather than bring us more problems?

I know, when someone walks into the room looking upset, gloomy or mad our curiosity gets the best of us. That part of us that cranes our neck to see the horrific accident or unfolding tragedy needs to know what’s wrong. Just tell me what’s wrong and I can relax. Not.

It truly is human nature. What’s wrong? Tell me what’s wrong. What’s wrong with me, with you, with this situation, with our government, our schools, our parents, our kids. Let’s get to the bottom of this! Let’s find out what caused this trouble so we can all point at it and shake our heads in righteous indignation. Oh that is SO WRONG.

I understand. I really do. I’m human too. I understand fear. I understand anxiety. I understand heartache. I understand loss. I understand uncertainty and pain. We all do. We’re not alone. We are all living exactly the same and completely different human experiences.

What can we do to help ourselves through these difficult emotions and times in our lives? How can we better support ourselves in the moment?  (And what would it take for us to want to figure out what creates these scenarios and situations over and over?)

What if we ask ourselves “What’s right about this situation?”

I know. I know. That’s a big, huge, enormous question in the midst of all that’s wrong. But, what if asking what’s right gave you a different perspective?

What if asking what’s right helped you to see what is right about this seeming tragedy in front of you?

Give it a shot. What have you got to lose? You’ve already been asking what’s wrong all this long time. How’s that working out for you? Asking “what’s wrong” has been and always will be lining you up vibrationally with more and more things you find wrong.

Decide now to begin asking “What’s right?”

I know that in the middle of confusion and upset asking what’s right about the situation feels weird, but go with it. Notice where the energy comes up in your body and feel through it. Relax and soothe yourself with such tenderness and love.

What harm could come from it? A positive perspective? You actually feeling better?

You might discover that you’re holding on to an old belief about yourself or others that’s creating this irritation or problem. Maybe you’re so focused on the problem that you’re totally missing the blessing that is your release from a dead-end job or relationship that was keeping you from having the money, love or support you deserve.

I remember thinking years back that I was ready for a new car. I loved my other car but some things were going wonky and I couldn’t seem to find a way to get them fixed. Not long after, on a 6am drive with my son to his high school for morning practice, were were rear-ended. It totaled the car. After my moment (about an hour or maybe half a day?) I realized I had been wanting a new car but wasn’t taking the steps to make it happen. I didn’t think I could afford it.

The universe showed me I could. I got another car, new to me and much better. I love my car so much. It feels so good to drive it. I enjoy just thinking about it.

In the moment, though, I was not pleased. Not pleased. Quite irritated and upset even. My son was driving. I was angry at the driver, angry it was six o’clock in the morning, angry my iced tea got poured into my lap. As soon as I jumped out of the passenger seat to see who had done this, I saw the culprit. A woman with two small children in her car and another vehicle behind her with two more small children. My initial anger dissipated into frustration and some compassion. Bless their hearts. We’re all up early shuttling our kids around. It was rainy and shit happens.

After all was said and done I sat in the drivers seat of my new car and laughed. This is what was right about that situation. I wanted a new car, needed one, but wasn’t taking the steps to make that happen. The universe gave me a little nudge.

What are you being nudged to do?

Think back over your life and recognize how many things have happened you first judged as bad that actually turned out better than you ever expected.

Now, look at a current struggle, take a deep breath and ask yourself “What’s right?”

There’s a perspective in every situation that serves you, but you have to be looking for it to find it. I am seeing you seeing it.

Sending all my love and support,

XOXO
Crystal

 

Weekly Photo Challenge: Reflections

Reflections. Great for our Weekly Photo Challenge and an excellent reminder for life as well.

“As above, so below, as within, so without, as the universe, so the soul…”  Hermes Trismegistus

Reflections of the Blanco River

Reflections of the Blanco River

Walking around 5 Mile Dam is always a pleasure. I love living near water and have appreciated fully the beauty of this spot for the past ten years.

On this trip, I loved the reflection the large rocks on the opposite river bank created.

Looking at the picture I began to see things we might not always notice at first glance.

What if we turned and looked at it from all directions?

What will you see?

Reflections5Mile_WebCCW90 Reflections5Mile_WebCW90 Reflections5Mile_WebUSD

I see hearts, faces, arms, hair, mouths and hands. I see arms reaching out to receive and I see arms reaching up in joyous exaltation.

How can we take this approach in our lives?

What will you notice when you look at your life from different perspectives?

Will you notice that what you may be feeling about a recent particular situation is actually a reaction to an old circumstance?

Do you realize our lives are just a reflection of our inner conversations?

Big change is only a reflection away.

Much Love,
Crystal

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Leave a comment below and tell me what you see or what areas of your life you’re looking forward to seeing from a new perspective.

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When Bad Things Happen

It happens. These things we witness and experience as bad or painful. We lose loved ones, jobs, friends, jewelery, books, pets and money. From the smallest most insignificant possessions to the most important people, loss is a part of our lives. Learning to allow it to pass with as little struggle as possible will create a rippling wave of ease through your life.

The important thing to remember in the midst of the hurt, grief, confusion, anger or sadness is this… there is a perspective around this very situation that serves you. A realization you’ll reach at some point that makes you say. “OHHhhhhhh… Ahhhhh. Bless my heart.”

It’s OK if you can’t see it or aren’t there right now.

Don’t rush yourself. Experience your experience and allow yourself to be human. Your current feelings are absolutely valid and as you accept and acknowledge how you feel the energy behind it also shifts and moves. The perspective is there and you’ll be able to find it soon enough.

Allow the tears to come and the shock of the loss to reverberate throughout your body. Tell yourself over and over in your mind, “This too shall pass and when it does, the clarity comes.” Give yourself the very best chance of healing by surrounding yourself with people that support and uplift you.

Remind yourself and your little ones of the love in your lives. Remind yourself of the joy you’ve experienced and feel such appreciation for the time well spent. Accept your momentary feelings of grief, loss, fear and confusion as part of the process, knowing that everything is always working out for you.

Seek out laughter and joyous experiences. Many of us feel that not worrying or feeling despondent would be a disservice to the person we’ve lost or that has suffered a seeming tragedy. This couldn’t be further from the truth.

The loved one we’ve lost is no longer suffering and wants you to feel the freedom and relief they are currently experiencing.

Those hospitalized or in rehab recovering from a tragedy or illness need your positive energy and high vibration to help them along the healing path. Seeing them as healthy, happy and vital is one of the most important things we can do for them.

Our energy and vibration is the most important “thing” we bring to this party called life.

Accepting that adversity is a part of your existence and allowing yourself to move through it with as much ease as possible is the greatest gift you can give yourself and those you love.

As you practice this, your mind will begin to understand the process and it won’t be so “bad” the next time a seeming catastrophe strikes. You’ll see it for what it is and move through it.

This doesn’t mean you’ll never feel pain again or won’t be upset by upsetting scenarios, it just means you won’t let it keep you down for long. You’ll feel through the pain and find the clarity much sooner.

But, wherever you are right now, is perfect. From right here you can get to wherever you want to be. You are absolutely loved, cared for and supported. Take a few deep breaths and feel it for yourself.

What could you do right now to feel just a little bit better about the situation?

Talk with a friend or play with a pet. Watch a funny movie or read a book that makes you laugh or gives you comfort. Find someone who gives really good hugs and get one. Allow yourself to be embraced, soothed and uplifted by those around that can see through the situation to the relief on the other side.

Sending you all my love, soothing, peace, ease and flow.

This too shall pass and all will be well.

Everything is always working out for you.

Much Love and Many Blessings,
Crystal

Weekly Photo Challenge – Perspective

Interesting that perspective is this weeks photo-challenge.

It’s so important for us to realize that our lives are completely about the perspective we hold.

When we’re troubled by something, we tend to look at it very closely. Examining and taking notes of every little think that we don’t like.

But, if we can take a few steps back from the situations the true reality can come into focus.

I love the series of pictures I took below on a trip with my (Dionne’s) family to Guatemala. We were hiking up Pacaya, one of Guatemala’s most active volcanoes.

As I thought of our challenge today, this felt like the perfect opportunity share a deeper perspective on perspectives.

The first picture I took was of course, close up.

Up close

Up close you can the small details.

But after the first picture I noticed a little more around my subject….

A little wider perspective begins to show even more details

A little wider perspective begins to show even more

My next picture was of the grand view. Not of us huffing and puffing our way up the volcano. But the true majesty of what we were experiencing.

Get the full perspective.

Allow yourself to see the full perspective.

This was much, much more than our aching limbs and labored breathing. Our momentary response to our current situation.

Taking a few steps back to notice what’s going on around us and how small we are in the grand scheme of things changes more that just our physical view.

We can begin to see the beauty of the big picture.

We can soothe ourselves through the momentary struggle to find beauty waiting patiently to assure us all is well.

Check out another blog I wrote about perspective.

Sending much love, soothing, peace, ease and flow to all,

Crystal

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Perspective is Everything.

My perspective - Straight Up (through the trees at Hoyt Arboretum)

My perspective – Straight Up (through the trees at Hoyt Arboretum, Portland OR)

per·spec·tive

/pərˈspektiv/
noun: perspective

A particular attitude toward or way of regarding something; a point of view.

The thing about life is this…. you get what you expect.

If you have a great outlook and positive attitude, it’s likely you’re pretty happy in your life. You expect things to work out for you and they usually do. Maybe not in the way you first thought you wanted, but ultimately you realize that what has happened is actually better than what you’d previously hoped for. Life is like that.

If you are negatively focused and cynical, life is probably a bitch and then you’ll die. You expect things to be irritating and annoying and they usually are. The jerk at the drive through gave you the wrong order, you’re always driving behind some other jerk on the highway and all the people you work with are idiots. No one ever does their part so that you can do yours and you usually end up having to do it all because that’s just your luck. You’re the only person that knows and does it right so you get stuck doing it. Life is like that.

“The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile universe.”

― Albert Einstein

You get what you expect, think about most often and focus on.

It’s simple.

Your perspective creates your reality.

If you think the world is out to get you, it is.

If you think the world is loving and supporting you, it is.

That’s why everyone’s lives are so different. Have you noticed how members of the same family can be so different? Raised in the same home with much of the same environmental triggers but some turn out happy, healthy or wealthy while others are unhappy, sick or poor.

We personally create our own reality whether we are aware of it or not.

If you find yourself being stuck in negative loops of bad service, poor health, liars and cheats, poverty, abuse, judgment or neglect, take a deep breath and relax. Maybe you have plenty of money or the relationship of your dreams but you’re still not happy, you take a deep breath too. All truly is well and you can have what you want.

It may be difficult for you to believe at first, but it’s quite easy to change once you know how to do it.

Give yourself the happiest, healthiest, most loving and abundant life you can imagine by noticing and releasing destructive habits of thought; Keep reaching for that better feeling perspective.

How do you find a better perspective?

First, you have to release the old energy that makes you think the crappy perspective you have now is the only one.

When you’re in the middle of a crisis or bad situation, the energy of it is flowing mightily through your body. Learn to let that energy (of things not being what you want) move through without holding on to it and your fresh new perspective presents itself.

You can absolutely do it for yourself, but lots of folks need some help. I’m here to empower you to live the life you want. It’s absolutely available to you.

All my love,
Crystal

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