Getting Through Hard Times

Posted on August 17, 2021 by Crystal Nuding

We weren’t born onto this Earth to be perfect or to have perfect lives. How would we grow if things were always perfect? So learning to feel better when things look bad is key to transforming everything.

Two years ago this week Dionne began chemotherapy (along with doing many other natural things). Today she is healthy, so grateful, and happy to FEEL better. Every night when she’s able to turn over in her sleep or gets up to go to the bathroom and walks without pain she feels herself half asleep saying Thank You with every step. She remembers feeling really depressed when she was emotionally worried and physically hurting.

When you’re in pain, emotional or physical, your mind can’t focus positively. So learning how to support yourself in some key ways opens the door for big change with less effort than first thought necessary. The mental and emotional work she did while allowing support from Western medicine was paramount in her moving through her diagnosis with much more ease than many could believe.

You can only THINK as good as you FEEL.

Bless all our hearts.

How to Feel Better Now

I often write about moving the energy physically around emotions and have described the process many times. So I decided a couple days ago to make an audio to share with my newsletter folks and anyone that joins, as a gift. I have just gotten a new computer, as my old one slowly fades out of sight, and was practicing with my new equipment.

I didn’t initially intend to share this one. I didn’t AT ALL intend to share this one. The sound isn’t perfect. I bumped my mic. I didn’t say EXACTLY what I might have wanted to say. Because, duh, it was my first try and I was recording myself. OY. For those that don’t know me, I don’t necessarily like a lot of attention. I don’t like to have my picture taken, to be videoed, or to be recorded, because I sound like a country hick and I’ve been around enough to know how folks judge folks for things like not being perfect. Whoa. Hold on there. Who’s judging whom for not being perfect? That would be me… judging myself. See how this works?

Bless my heart. Bless all of our hearts. We’re not supposed to be perfect. We’re supposed to be as good as we can be, and do the best job we can, everyday, to get up and try again tomorrow. In my estimation, our objective is to see the world as God (The One True Infinite Creator, Universe, Spirit, whatever that means to YOU) sees it. Understanding that everything happens for a reason and we don’t always get to know why.

What others come into this life to experience and grow through is between them and their Higher Power and we have to soothe ourselves, and those around us, with kindness, gentleness, and support.

My parents lost a very wonderful young man yesterday. He worked for them on the ranch and was so kind, helpful, and sweet. I loved so much that they had him, and he had them. He struggled with things they knew about and probably more they had no clue of. The loss of that precious boy is being felt by so many. The idea of people suffering or struggling breaks my heart.

Clarity Through Pain

As I have felt through my own emotions and their corresponding physical sensations… my heart, heavy and aching, for him and his father/family, and my parents and his friends, my solar plexus in a knot. I feel a knot in my throat and find myself holding my breath. Usually during a thought that’s sad or looking at the situation from a very limited human perspective, instead of the way God sees it. Bless our Hearts.

When I notice this, I do this breathing exercise. I’ve talked about it a million times. It’s the thing that makes me feel better every time. It’s the thing that I want to share with as many people as possible so they can see and have the experience themselves of relief. From any emotion, from any sensation, relief. There’s plenty of brain science behind this, but from experience, I know.

When you FEEL better, you can THINK better.

And when you feel better, you can see there is support out there for you and that people love you and that we can get through anything. And with God, there is Grace. So whatever comes, it’ll all be ok.

Sharing My Process to Get You Through a Hard Time

So, I’m sharing it with you. Complete in it’s incompleteness. Perfect in it’s imperfection. My heart pounds now as I type this, thinking of sharing my first try. I grew up believing I should do everything right the first time. Let me just tell you that’s ridiculous. This isn’t the BEST I’ll ever do, but it’s a tool. And a powerful one at that. And tools don’t have to be perfect. They just have to work.

And in this moment I wish that he had had a tool to make him feel better. And the idea that I wouldn’t share something that might help someone because I don’t think it’s perfect is enough to make me share it, ready or not.

No one is perfect. Nothing is perfect. No life is perfect. Sometimes, things look and feel dark and difficult. But, there is always hope. If we can reach for a “just a little better” in difficult moments it will begin to ease. Soothing our body with this exercise will bypass the brain and begin to soften the body. Which will help shift our perspective and bring some relief.

So, do this breathing exercise and feel better. I love you. I want your complete and total health and happiness. Share this with whomever you think might need it, or use it, or share it themselves with someone in need.

Life can be good and YOU CAN FEEL GOOD. No matter what you’re going through and no matter what is happening in your life.

Feel Better Now – Listen to this
Simple Breathing Technique and Guide to Moving Energy

When Bad Things Happen

Posted on March 24, 2014 by Crystal Nuding

It happens. These things we witness and experience as bad or painful. We lose loved ones, jobs, friends, jewelery, books, pets and money. From the smallest most insignificant possessions to the most important people, loss is a part of our lives. Learning to allow it to pass with as little struggle as possible will create a rippling wave of ease through your life.

The important thing to remember in the midst of the hurt, grief, confusion, anger or sadness is this… there is a perspective around this very situation that serves you. A realization you’ll reach at some point that makes you say. “OHHhhhhhh… Ahhhhh. Bless my heart.”

It’s OK if you can’t see it or aren’t there right now.

Don’t rush yourself. Experience your experience and allow yourself to be human. Your current feelings are absolutely valid and as you accept and acknowledge how you feel the energy behind it also shifts and moves. The perspective is there and you’ll be able to find it soon enough.

Allow the tears to come and the shock of the loss to reverberate throughout your body. Tell yourself over and over in your mind, “This too shall pass and when it does, the clarity comes.” Give yourself the very best chance of healing by surrounding yourself with people that support and uplift you.

Remind yourself and your little ones of the love in your lives. Remind yourself of the joy you’ve experienced and feel such appreciation for the time well spent. Accept your momentary feelings of grief, loss, fear and confusion as part of the process, knowing that everything is always working out for you.

Seek out laughter and joyous experiences. Many of us feel that not worrying or feeling despondent would be a disservice to the person we’ve lost or that has suffered a seeming tragedy. This couldn’t be further from the truth.

The loved one we’ve lost is no longer suffering and wants you to feel the freedom and relief they are currently experiencing.

Those hospitalized or in rehab recovering from a tragedy or illness need your positive energy and high vibration to help them along the healing path. Seeing them as healthy, happy and vital is one of the most important things we can do for them.

Our energy and vibration is the most important “thing” we bring to this party called life.

Accepting that adversity is a part of your existence and allowing yourself to move through it with as much ease as possible is the greatest gift you can give yourself and those you love.

As you practice this, your mind will begin to understand the process and it won’t be so “bad” the next time a seeming catastrophe strikes. You’ll see it for what it is and move through it.

This doesn’t mean you’ll never feel pain again or won’t be upset by upsetting scenarios, it just means you won’t let it keep you down for long. You’ll feel through the pain and find the clarity much sooner.

But, wherever you are right now, is perfect. From right here you can get to wherever you want to be. You are absolutely loved, cared for and supported. Take a few deep breaths and feel it for yourself.

What could you do right now to feel just a little bit better about the situation?

Talk with a friend or play with a pet. Watch a funny movie or read a book that makes you laugh or gives you comfort. Find someone who gives really good hugs and get one. Allow yourself to be embraced, soothed and uplifted by those around that can see through the situation to the relief on the other side.

Sending you all my love, soothing, peace, ease and flow.

This too shall pass and all will be well.

Everything is always working out for you.

Much Love and Many Blessings,
Crystal

Alphabet Soup

Posted on July 3, 2013 by Crystal Nuding

Photo by Tasya Menaker

Do you ever lie awake in bed at night and wish you could turn your brain off? Chores, bills, family issues running through your mind, one after the other. Things to do, business to handle, problems to solve and beside all of that, the world is going to hell in a hand-basket.

It’s really not, it just serves a handful of folks to make you think it is.

Not to worry, I can help.

Being human we all have this busy monkey mind problem. From where you may be right now, your thoughts can jump around from who’s done wrong, to what you’ve done wrong.

Focusing on what is bad, wrong, terrible, unjust, wrong, wrong, wrong(did I say wrong?) is the natural order of the day for most folks. If you think that’s just the way you are and it can’t change, you’re wrong.

It’s easy to refocus our minds with a bit of information and a couple of simple, easy tools in our belt to use when we need them.

Tip 1 – Get into your “Right Brain.”

As you know, our brain is divided into a right and left hemisphere. The left side of your brain is the analytical, critical thinking side(notice the word CRITICAL?), while the right hemisphere of your brain is where your creativity comes from. When your brain is running a mile a minute, say aloud or to yourself, “let’s get into our right brain.” It will help slow down the computer(your brain) and allow you to focus on something more pleasurable and relaxing.

Tip 2 – Give your brain a job.

Once you’ve gotten yourself into your “right mind,” consciously begin to think of other things. As I was lying in bed the other night trying to turn my brain off so I could get to sleep and rest easily, I started this little game in my head.

Using the alphabet, I started saying words that soothed me and focused me easily in a different direction(I was asleep by K). Coming up with the next word took all of my attention as I was searching for words that felt good so my busy mind was busy supporting me. You can’t keep thinking of what you don’t like if you are actively thinking about something else.

Below is the list of words I started compiling.

Amazing Appreciation Abundance Adventure Allow Afloat
Bold Believe Boundless Beauty Breakthrough BE Breathtaking
Caring Capable Compassion Confidence Creativity Colorful
Delicious Desire Dreams Daring Divine Dazzle
Exciting Effortless Ecstasy Empower Enjoy Ease Epic Exhilarating Expansive
Friendly Flowing Fun Faith Free Fabulous Fantastic Flowery
Gracious Grandeur Grateful Giggling Gentle Groovy Graceful
Happy Hilarious Hopeful Heart Hugs Honor Healthy
Inspired Imagination Independence Innovation Intention
Joyous Jokes Juicy Jolly Jocularity Jazz
Kindness Kiss Kinky
Love Laugh Luminous Life Lounging Lively Luscious Liberty Lavish Lucrative
Miracle Moments Memories Magic Mysterious
Natural Nature Nice Neat Nurtured Nourished
Original Optimist Orgasmic Outstanding
Purposeful Positivity Potential Possibility Peace Passionate Prosperity Power Playful Psychedelic
Quirky Quality Quilt Quiver Queendom Quaint
Romantic Relationship Romance Respect Robust Replenished Recharged Rested Renewed Relief
Strong Sweet Smart Solutions Shine Soothing Shift Sensual Serene Spectacular Success
Tantalizing Truth Triumph Transformation Thankful Terrific Trust
Unfolding Universe Uplifting Utopia Uninhibited Understood United Unequaled Unity
Vision Visualize Vibrations Vivacious Vibrant Virile Voluptuous Variety
Wonderful Worthiness Wonder Whole Wise Wellness Wealth Whimsical
Xylophone (haha, you let me know what X letters you come up with!)
Yes Yummy Yielding Yay Youthful Yachting
Zealous Zest Zone Zing Zippy

You can do it spontaneously or plan for it. Sometimes it helps to have a plan in place for moments when you know you could have a hard time focusing on the positive. Write them down on a piece of paper and just read them aloud or to yourself. Post your list in your car, on your bathroom mirror, the refrigerator or in your office.

Don’t let yourself spend too much time fretting, worrying or focusing on things that upset you. We, as human beings, are vibrational boomerangs. What you put out there you absolutely do get back.

So when you find yourself raging against the machine(any of them or their drivers) take a couple steps back and a big deep breath.

Allowing yourself to move the energy physically in the moment and placing your conscious focus on better feeling things move you away from what you don’t want and draw you closer to that thing or situation that you would prefer, that feels good.

Simply reading a list of positive, good feeling words is much more helpful and effective than complaining about what happened and repeating that story to as many people will listen. You may think sharing your woes feels good, but it actually only creates more of what you don’t want.

Give it a shot. Make your own list or use words from mine. When you find yourself focusing in a way that doesn’t feel good do yourself a favor and consciously turn it around.

Let me know how this list works for you. Please share any other good feeling words I have undoubtedly left out.

Seeing your absolute freedom, happiness, wellness and abundance!

Much Love to you,
Crystal

Much appreciation to Tasya Menaker for the alphabet soup pic!
Check her out here – http://www.flickr.com/photos/tasyamenaker/6643549023/

Many Blessings

Posted on April 16, 2013 by Crystal Nuding

In the wake of the shocking and upsetting incident in Boston, I am witnessing more and more of what I’ve been watching happen for a while now. The world is changing. People are reaching out and caring for one another.

I have seen infinitely more love and support than outrage. Not that outrage is wrong, it should be felt and moved through like all feelings. It’s just not productive to project it to the rest of the world. Of course the perpetrator/s will be discovered and justice will be served, but I prefer and appreciate the focus of so many people on the many blessings, the helpers.

I love how Abraham has shared with us that the people intimately involved in a tragedy actually deal with it better than those of us far away who don’t have the opportunity to physically help and be a part of the comforting and healing.

Many folks involved are thrilled to be alive and gain a fresh perspective on life. And while, yes, they may be injured, even to the point of loosing a limb, they recognize the gift they have been given. Life. Now.

As someone thousand’s of miles away that can’t physically jump in and begin to help, many can get stuck in their thinking about the upset and worry over what has happened or could happen. We want to do something. We want something done.

While our society greatly values physical action, your powerful, positive and loving thoughts do much more for the people of the tragedy than you might realize.

We live in a world of oscillating fields(we are them and they are everything… science lesson later) and when you hold the vision of health, happiness and harmony for others you are affecting their field. We can stand firmly where we are, hold the vision of peace, love, soothing and healing in our hearts and give that to the people directly affected by the tragedy and those many blessings, the precious helpers that were within reach this time.

Life is a roller coaster. Tragedy happens, right alongside heroism, compassion and kindness. Recognize the trouble and immediately throw yourself into the solution. Allow the moment you need to soothe yourself and then you can begin to soothe others.

You are much more powerful than you know. Shine your light and let’s wrap Boston and the tender human beings there in loving kindness, peace and hope.

The rain always clears and the sun always shines again.
Let that be your reminder to allow what is to pass so that what will be can come.

You are loved and cared for in ways you can’t imagine. Count your many blessings daily and be sure to count yourself as a blessing to others. You are.

(512) 665-4414 | Crystal@CrystalNuding.com

Call or email to schedule your session today.

Weekly Photo Challenge: Love

Posted on January 25, 2013 by Crystal Nuding

As a child, every Sunday we went to Granny and Pop’s (my great-grandparents) house for dinner. Granny’s food was mouthwatering. Our Sunday dinner was almost always fried chicken and gravy. If she had prepared another vegetable that wasn’t mashed potatoes, I’d cry and she’d whip up some instant potatoes that you’d swear were better than the real thing. I also had to have fried cornbread patties, so I could pile my mashed potatoes on them. YUM. I had very specific ideas about what I wanted to eat. And as an adult that no longer gets to eat her delicious cooking, I’m glad I made a fuss.

Week-ends with my mother’s parents, Joycie Bear and Papa, assured we’d have sausage, biscuits and gravy for breakfast, every morning. Waking up to Papa whistling in the kitchen, the smell of sausage and bacon, knowing we didn’t need to do a thing until ~~called to the table~~. (tickled out of bed, usually… we’d wait for him, giggling)

As I recall these memories of my childhood love rushes in and fills me completely. The love they put into the meals and their willingness and joy to please and make us happy is overwhelming. As much as I knew they loved me (it was A LOT), I felt it in their food.

Cooking is one of my greatest joys, second only to sharing the food I’ve prepared with anyone and everyone that might possibly need or enjoy it. I smell my grandparents in my kitchen often. I’ll stop what I’m doing and take big, deep breaths inhaling it all. The food, the memories, the absolute knowledge that food IS love.

My partner, Dionne and I spent 3 weeks in Italy this past summer, visiting my little sister, Johanna who’s living there for the next year. After weeks of traveling and eating delicious Italian food, I was ready to cook. It was our last few days with my sissy and we were all beginning to feel a bit of sadness in anticipation of our departure.

So, what did we do?

We had three days of good ol’ West Texas country cooking. I fried everything that wasn’t tied down. We laughed and talked and breathed deeply the scent of love. I felt such appreciation for my country roots and the yummy comfort food I was raised on.

This is fried chicken and cream gravy just like Granny and Papa made for us as kids. Looking back at this picture, the hearts on the table cloth say it all.

Granny’s Fried Chicken and Papa’s Gravy = Love

(You can see more pic’s in Johanna’s Comfort Food Sessions photo album on FB!)

Taming The Voices Webcast

Posted on January 11, 2013 by Crystal Nuding

After a hiccup in the beginning, Roxanne and I got connected.

Here’s the video…. 🙂

Check out Roxanne at her site: http://inthetransition.com/

Follow her on Twitter – @divinerox

Taming The Voices In Your Head with Roxanne Darling – Part 1

Living Through Loss

Posted on December 27, 2012 by Crystal Nuding

Winter Sky – Looking up through the trees in Washington Park, Portland Oregon.

It’s happened. You’ve lost a loved one. The relationship you thought was forever is over. The job you once loved so dearly is no more. Tragedy, personal or global. The major occurrence in your life you think will be the end of you. It won’t.

You will get over it. You will feel better. Life will be OK again. You will be happy. You will find joy in the memories. You will breathe freely with light and easy breaths. Your heart will sing. Your mind will be at ease. You will feel inspired and joyous. You will feel peace in your heart.

But, in the mean time…

Soothe yourself physically first. The shock of such a loss is hard on our hearts, minds and bodies. Begin to do the easiest things first. Move your body to take care of yourself. Breathe deeply, often. We rarely use our lungs to full capacity, instead we take shallow, shorter breaths. Notice your breathing rhythms and let yourself take slower, deeper, more cleansing breaths. Just doing this will also help slow your mind down and relax. Tell yourself you’ll think about it later. Right now, allow the energy in your body to move and flow on through with as much ease as you can.

As soon as is possible(and as often as you need to), put on your robe or most comfortable pj’s and straighten up your space. Light some candles and put on some soothing music. Sit in your most comfortable chair or lay down on the couch, get a blanket if you’re cold. Curl up or wrap your arms around yourself and breathe. Notice how your body is feeling. Lightly “check in” with your entire body. Start with your toes and work your way up.

Getting into your body and out of your head is the key short-cut.
When you “think” about what you feel, it/the feeling, never goes away.
When you feel what you feel, it can move rather quickly.

Allow yourself the sadness. Cry until you stop, and you will. Breathe into the grief (anger, hurt) you feel in your heart, stomach or throat. Feel where you feel it and breathe. Allow yourself to just physically feel the sensations in your body. When you feel yourself tightening your stomach, relax it and breathe. Just notice where the feelings are and also notice how the physical sensation moves when you focus on it. Feel the tightness relax and move up, notice the relief you feel after a big yawn. You are moving the energy. Let it take as long as it takes. If it’s quick, great. If it takes a while, no big deal. This was a big experience and you deserve your own loving kindness, care and compassion.

Give yourself a moment to fully experience your experience. Give yourself permission to feel every feeling you ever have without judgment. Intend now to consciously soothe yourself in the quiet of your own mind. Remind yourself it is all going to be ok and better than that, it’s perfect.

Life is always working out for you and just because you don’t understand this right now, doesn’t mean you won’t. It just means you need to allow yourself to be where you are in your experience. With experience comes knowledge.

It will all be clear one day. Relax in that knowing. The better you get at moving the energy physically in your body the quicker the clarity comes. It’s only our minds that tell us something is wrong. Our physical bodies are instruments of communication between ourselves and our source. Learn to control your mind (and it’s propensity to focus negatively) and your ability to hear, know and understand those communications increases exponentially.

I send so much Love and Many Blessings to each and every person struggling with loss today and every day. I am holding the vision for absolute happiness, health, vitality and peace in your heart. You are loved and supported more than you know.

Tell Me How You Really Feel

Posted on December 13, 2012 by Crystal Nuding

Check out my latest article in Austin All Natural magazine. If you live in the Austin area (or San Marcos or Wimberley) you can pick it up around town. If you don’t live around here, you may also download the pdf from Austin All Natural’s website – AustinAllNatural.com/december-2012

TELL ME HOW YOU REALLY FEEL

by Crystal Nuding

Behind every great athlete is a great coach that saw their potential before they were able to see it themselves. ~Esther Hicks and Abraham

What if you alone were responsible for creating the reality you live in? What if you got to pick and choose all the little details of your life? What would it look like? Would you have money? That perfect, healthy body you’ve been working (or not working) so hard for? Would your partner be everything you ever dreamed, your children and pets perfectly behaved, always pleasing you?
Sit with those thoughts a moment, get a picture of your perfect life, and hold it in your mind. The feeling of absolute power – finally, everything exactly the way you want it.
Breathe. Let this feeling wash over you.
Doesn’t that feel good?

What if?
What if you were told you’re already responsible for creating the reality you’re living? That day in and day out, the way you feel about your life is within your control, and is the key to controlling reality.
Would you believe it? Do you believe it?
All day, every day, you’re making choices that create your life, even things that irritate and upset you. What if you knew the feelings of frustration and upset were propelling you toward what you want – and should be appreciated?
What if your key to freedom is knowing how to navigate those feelings?

You’re already driving. Might as well do it consciously.
Imagine driving a car, but not looking at the road. You’re likely to run into more than a few things you hadn’t planned on, and certainly weren’t expecting. When you’re aware of your role as the driver, your head’s up and your eyes are on the road.
You can learn how to drive (or navigate feelings) on your own, but it’s easier to get a little help. You can be your own coach with just a little practice – and maybe an occasional touch of the divine.
The universe is set up in the most brilliant, efficient way. Quantum physics and The Law of Attraction explain it beautifully – in theory. To live and experience it is to be free.
All you need to do is allow yourself to be soothed and uplifted. (It’s the holidays – even the most laid-back can use some soothing.) It’s never as bad as you think, and the only thing that ever needs to change – in any situation – is your perspective.
Are you letting your focus make you unhappy, letting outside situations determine how you feel, listening to things that upset you and make you mad?
Turn them off.
Once you know the secret, the simple trick that can soothe your body and mind, nothing’s that big a deal – and you’ll recognize even the biggest deals as pure potential.

Be Soothed and Uplifted

Crystal Nuding is a natural born empath, soother, uplifter, and healer whose gift is the ability to help you live more joyfully and happily. Through live sessions in South Austin, by phone or Skype, you can find and move old stagnant energy that keeps you stuck and cultivate an attitude of positive expectation. Initial sessions are in a series of three for continuity and support. (Mention Austin All Natural (OR this blog!) and receive a $25 discount.)
(512) 665-4414 http://www.CrystalNuding.com

Free At Last!

Posted on October 24, 2012 by Crystal Nuding

So much going on these days. Energy is moving at an all time HIGH. I feel things changing around me. I wake most mornings feeling warm and fuzzy. That is, unless it’s one of THOSE mornings. Or my energy is moving faster than I am able to let it in. Even those days are ok. I recognize my resistance, acknowledge the movement, take a deep breath and thank heavens for my life and where I am in it. I know that even in my pain, irritation, sadness or frustration, it is all energy and it’s all moving.

As I was trying to fall asleep the other night, my mind was running a mile a minute. Most of it good and exciting, but I had a flash of a moment from my young adulthood I wasn’t particularly proud of or happy to remember. At that moment, I began soothing myself. Usually I’ll say “Stop It” or “Ok, thank you very much, next subject”, but this time it was different.

I first said I love you… bless your heart. I then started explaining to myself all the reasons everything is ok. I told myself how I had found my way, and how things always worked out. I told myself to look around at what had changed in my life and in the lives of the people around me. I spoke sweetly, calmly and softly to myself. Telling myself all the things I always wanted someone else to tell me. Speaking the words of comfort that most comforted me. Saying what I needed to hear, that only I know and understand. My heart softened and utterly melted. It felt so sweet and good. I knew, I had found freedom.

It’s only our own minds that torture us. So… YOU talk. It’s crazy to me how we will stand idly by while our mind whips us and tortures us with past experiences, conversations or actions that are truly ancient history. The only thing that keeps us attached to them is our mind. A close friend of mine was struggling with her obsessive negative thoughts, I told her, “only one can talk at a time, so you do it, deliberately.” Don’t just try to stop the negative thoughts, CULTIVATE the positive ones. Just start talking to yourself, lovingly and soothingly until you don’t even remember what your mind was trying to scare you with!

If your monkey mind is giving you trouble, give this a try. If you need to write out a script of sweet, loving, nurturing things to read in a tortured moment, do it. Until you’re able to go with your Large Self and flow those loving words in the moment, have an alternate plan.

If you need help formulating an alternate plan, I’m happy to help.

Here’s to your Freedom!

So much Love to YOU,
Crystal

Get Sad, Make A Decision

Posted on October 23, 2012 by Crystal Nuding

I wrote an article a while back called Get Mad, Make A Decision. I wrote about finally getting tired of not getting what I wanted and making the decision to do something about it. Finally getting mad enough to say, “OK. I’ve had it. Something is changing NOW.”

What changes now is all up to you. Stop doing that thing that you know you do. Stop letting someone else be your excuse for you not having what you want. Decide what you want and head in that direction. No matter what anyone else says or thinks, this is your life, live it.

Sometimes you have to get mad before you’ll make a decision like that, but sometimes, something happens in your life that doesn’t make you mad, it makes you sad. Things happen in our lives that we don’t understand and from the very sad and hurt place we stand, the greater plan of our lives can be difficult, if not impossible to see. This is when we have to just be sad, and make a decision.

A little over 1 year ago, my sweet wiener dog, Zupe made his transition. He was sick for about a month before we knew it was time to let him go. During that month, we did everything we knew to do energetically and physically to heal and “save” our little dog, but in the end, it was his time. When it finally happened, we were exhausted and devastated. We tried so hard. We did everything we could do. (Some folks won’t understand loving a dog so much, it’s ok.) People have had the same experience with loved ones that have suffered too long. (Or maybe you’ve just lost a relationship or have found yourself at the end of something beautiful.)

I realized as we let Zupe go, that through his passing he was offering us a beautiful gift. Freedom. We all have this opportunity when something this big happens in our lives.

Decide now that you’re going to allow every bit of old energy that no longer serves and uplifts you to move. Let yourself grieve. For the loss of your loved one, for the pain you have suffered, for the hurt of everyone involved. Stay out of your head as much as possible during this time and only feel. Let yourself feel the physical feelings (the sick feeling in your stomach or the intense ache in your heart) of pain, sadness and grief in your body and let them move. Laugh every time you feel like it and rejoice that your loved one is laughing with you. Spend as much time outside in nature as you can and take good care of yourself. Be so kind, compassionate and loving to yourself. Soothe yourself in the quiet of your own mind when you begin to feel upset. Be your own best friend and cheerleader.

Allow yourself the time to feel everything. Don’t try to rush it or think you should already be feeling better. Remember that this too shall pass. One day the memories of your loved one will bring such pleasure and joy, rather than the loss you feel so deeply now.

Love is eternal. These physical bodies are only a very small part of our whole being… our spirit is always in the non-physical. Death is a misconception. It’s only transition and they are never far away.

As I held Zupe to my chest before his transition, I felt him melt into my heart. I knew instinctively he’d always be there. Never parted from me, but certainly, always a part of me.

Celebrate the joy and freedom our friends and loved ones feel once they’ve made their transition. Feel the exhilaration they feel being free from the vehicle that finally wore out. Talk to your loved ones daily and listen for the answer in your heart. Remember, when you are thinking about them, they are with you. Don’t feel the separation, feel the love. They are with us, always.