Remember This

The Daily Prompt – Powerful Suggestion

“What’s the one piece of advice you wish someone had given you a year (or five, or ten…) ago?”

I thought a lot about this question as I stood before the group of middle school kids. What did I need to know at this age? What did I wish someone would have told me? How can I make the biggest difference in their lives in the short time I have in front of them? What is the most important thing for us to always remember?

You are a vibrational being.

Energy and emotions are supposed to flow through you, not stick around forever. They will only stay with you if you talk about, blog about or share them repeatedly.

You are not your thoughts. Your brain is evolutionarily wired to focus on what’s wrong.
No worries, you can change that.

Your mind will hold onto hurts and failures much longer than your successes.
You can change that, too. Cultivate an awareness of your thoughts and
consciously choose to support yourself mentally.
Practice helps.

Your mind is a powerful focusing tool and you will always get
what you spend the most time focusing on. Success or failure.
There will be no wondering “what went wrong,” your focus brought it about.

Science has proven we are vibrational beings.
Western medicine and surgery is not the only way to heal.
Anything only works because we believe it does.
Modern medicine is like using an old Remington typewriter when you’ve got a brand new, lightning fast Mac to work on.
Energy medicine is the cutting edge technology.

You can actually feel the energy behind your emotions physically in your body
and release it to shift a current situation.
When you allow the energy to move, everything changes.

What you feel is more important than what you think.
When you quiet your mind and tune into your body, you get all the answers you need.
Yes, you can do this. Everyone can.

Aligning your energy with what you want
is more powerful than any physical effort you can exert.

Moving forward or acting out of fear or anger will only create
another situation that makes you feel afraid or angry.
Move the energy and everything changes.
It’s all energy and it’s all moving.

Grown ups don’t always handle situations in the best way.
We learn what we learn from whom we learn it. Sometimes it’s good, sometimes it’s not.
Take the good and leave the rest.

Beliefs are just thoughts you keep thinking, over and over and over.
They aren’t always true.
Many of them don’t serve you.

If someone is trying to scare you, they are manipulating you.
Sometimes they mean to, sometimes they’re just scared.

There is no such thing as death.
We are energy.
Energy cannot be created nor destroyed.
It merely changes form.

Your passed loved ones are still around you, all day everyday, personality intact.
They are aware of you and your situation.
They love you and are offering you support and guidance in every moment.
When you tune into that, you can hear, feel, sense, or know whatever you need to know.
Yes, you can do this too. Even you.

There’s nothing to be scared of.
You carry your safety with you.
When you learn to move energy before you take action
you never have to worry about your security.

Be your own biggest cheerleader.
Be so kind and supportive of yourself in the quiet of your own mind.
Sure you want friends and loved ones,
but you can’t get all of your soothing and acceptance from them.
The way you treat yourself in your mind is the way the world will treat you.

I love you.
So many people love you.
The Universe/God/Source Energy/All That Is, loves you.
You’ve been placed on a perfect planet that supports your every need.
Your source loves you so much that you breathe in and out
and your heart beats everyday of your life without you having to think about it.

What more evidence do you need?
Ask me, I’ll give it to you.

My talk with the middle school kids didn’t go exactly like this. I kept it more on the scientific side. I wanted to help them understand on a basic level what their physical body and mind is doing when they find themselves nervous, scared or upset.

Faced with a big, important test, criticism from peers and family or not fitting in can feel terrible in the moment.

But when you know your automatic responses are just that, automatic, you can relax and give yourself the opportunity to feel better and find the perspective that serves you.

You’re never stuck. There is always a solution. And it’s always easier than you think.

I love you so much,
Crystal

To learn more about the daily prompt click here.

Check out Crystal’s new online course – The Energy Element
Find out more about Sessions with Crystal

Surfacing

Sisters with Bunny

Johanna, Bunny, Melody and Me in Oct 2012

I feel like I’m just beginning to come up for air. I’ve been out of touch for the past couple of weeks. My experience was difficult, but one I’m truly happy to have had.

My sister Johanna and I spent ten days caring for our 89 yr old grandmother with dementia. I’ve been completely out of the “internet” loop and off the computer. My cell phone service was terrible and they don’t have wifi so plugging in was the only option… after I ran out my data plan using my own hotspot. Oops. And aside from that, I didn’t care.

My grandmother is the matriarch of our family. Strong and prideful. Her house always clean and perfectly decorated. The fridge always filled with fresh and delicious food. I remember eating yummy sandwiches on wooden trays with thinly sliced bread, swiss cheese and avocados. And there were always Fritos, her favorite. She has great taste and beautiful clothes. Always classy and elegant with more than a touch of wild and mean. Her house, her rules. “This is not a gymnasium.” That’s how I remember her.

She’s still in there. We’d get glimpses here and there. But much of the time she wanted to sleep. We tried talking to her about her younger life and ours. We’d get moments of clarity, then she’d be gone again. Her only concerns were with having her bags packed, her purse and keys, her dog, Runner’s lead and who’s picking her up. She’s ready to go home.

Leaving her with my parents and coming home to try to get back into the swing of things has been interesting. Trading my laptop for holding, supporting and gently guiding my Grandmother around had a profound effect on me. I was shocked how familiar she felt to me.

Everything about her, I felt I knew. Even though I haven’t spent much time with her in the past 20 or more years and certainly have never been so close as we were in these past days. It’s me. So many things about her are me.

I’m still processing the experience; finding comfort and clarity in what I’ve discovered.

It’s not over. I’m still moving through the energy of it all. Alternately crying and laughing over scenarios I recall or remembering a picture I saw or letter I read. We’re all so closely connected. All intertwined in this game of life. Our lives weaving in and out of each others so seamlessly you don’t even realize that which is you, is also them.

Make no mistake. We are all here for a very important reason. To be our very best and happiest selves. To take what we’ve been given by all those around us and make it into something we love and appreciate.

It’s not always easy, but it can be done. It won’t happen immediately, although it can. Usually, it takes some time and reflection.

When we let ourselves truly feel in our body what we’re experiencing, instead of only thinking about it, it isn’t so difficult. It feels more familiar and comforting. Our minds tend to separate us, but our feelings will always bring us home.

Allow yourself your habitual thought processes at first, give yourself a break and just notice the direction your thoughts are taking. As you expand your awareness it will be easier and easier to separate yourself from the scenario.

Whatever your struggles may be these days, be so soft with yourself. We are such tender human beings.

Every feeling you have ever felt is absolutely valid. You are experiencing your experience and that was the way you felt. No worries at all.

Begin to give yourself the gift of just feeling what you feel, without any commentary from your mind. It will certainly be a transition if you’re one that is critical or judgmental of yourself and others, but you can do it. I’m here to help.

All my love to you,
Crystal

Find yourself in others and you’ll always know the truth.

Weekly Photo Challenge: The Sign Says

The World Is Full Of Beauty

The world is full of beauty.

Although life may not be what you want right now, things are constantly changing.

Appreciate and experience your experience, feel what it makes you feel and move on.

Let the past be the past.

Allow yourself to fully focus on creating the future you want.

Let your heart fill with love and watch the world change around you.

Here’s to a wonderful week-end!

Much Love,
Crystal

Be Your Own Valentine

Be Your Own Valentine!

Be Your Own Valentine!

This time of year, whether coupled or not, many find ourselves longing. Society, media and big business have a lot riding on your not feeling happy and complete. If you’re constantly longing, you’re constantly buying. The next biggest thing… new car, new clothes to keep up with the latest fashion, whatever it takes to feel better.

Many folks spend this time of year wishing for someone to love and adore them, even when they may already have someone who does.

We all want someone who will understand us, treat us with kindness, compassion and always appreciate our eccentricities.

Though we think we want it from other people, who we really need it from is much closer. The single most important relationship we will have in our entire lives is with ourselves.

Your true and perfect partner is you. The way you treat yourself in the quiet of your own mind will be directly reflected in your outer life and circumstances.

Too many of us spend our lives waiting for that perfect someone to soothe us and care for us in the way we want and need to be cared for. But, actually giving ourselves what we need is the quickest way to create it in our outer life reality.

No matter your past or how your life has been up until this point, things can change and you can have what you want.

When you find yourself feeling vulnerable, soothe yourself. Allow yourself to be reminded that we are all fragile human beings that spend way too much time in our heads and not enough time in our hearts (bodies).

Take yourself out to dinner. Run yourself a bubble bath and get yourself your own favorite treat. Spend time physically soothing and pampering yourself.

Do this for yourself. Be kind and compassionate in your mind when you need support and the universe will respond accordingly. If you are critical of yourself and others, you will find the world to be a very critical place. Begin finding beauty in everyone and everything you see and that too will be reflected in your world.

Taking the time to appreciate what you currently have while daydreaming about what you want and visualizing things that please you will yield profound results.

Rather than chocolate or flowers this Valentine’s day, give yourself the gift that will change your life. Be your own best friend. If you need help get it. Let life be easy. Learn to support and uplift yourself and you will be amazed at what happens in your world. I’m here to help.

Weekly Photo Challenge: Love

As a child, every Sunday we went to Granny and Pop’s (my great-grandparents) house for dinner. Granny’s food was mouthwatering. Our Sunday dinner was almost always fried chicken and gravy. If she had prepared another vegetable that wasn’t mashed potatoes, I’d cry and she’d whip up some instant potatoes that you’d swear were better than the real thing. I also had to have fried cornbread patties, so I could pile my mashed potatoes on them. YUM. I had very specific ideas about what I wanted to eat. And as an adult that no longer gets to eat her delicious cooking, I’m glad I made a fuss.

Week-ends with my mother’s parents, Joycie Bear and Papa, assured we’d have sausage, biscuits and gravy for breakfast, every morning. Waking up to Papa whistling in the kitchen, the smell of sausage and bacon, knowing we didn’t need to do a thing until called to the table. (tickled out of bed, usually… we’d wait for him, giggling)

As I recall these memories of my childhood love rushes in and fills me completely. The love they put into the meals and their willingness and joy to please and make us happy is overwhelming. As much as I knew they loved me (it was A LOT), I felt it in their food.

Cooking is one of my greatest joys, second only to sharing the food I’ve prepared with anyone and everyone that might possibly need or enjoy it. I smell my grandparents in my kitchen often. I’ll stop what I’m doing and take big, deep breaths inhaling it all. The food, the memories, the absolute knowledge that food IS love.

My partner, Dionne and I spent 3 weeks in Italy this past summer, visiting my little sister, Johanna who’s living there for the next year. After weeks of traveling and eating delicious Italian food, I was ready to cook. It was our last few days with my sissy and we were all beginning to feel a bit of sadness in anticipation of our departure.

So, what did we do?

We had three days of good ol’ West Texas country cooking. I fried everything that wasn’t tied down. We laughed and talked and breathed deeply the scent of love. I felt such appreciation for my country roots and the yummy comfort food I was raised on.

This is fried chicken and cream gravy just like Granny and Papa made for us as kids. Looking back at this picture, the hearts on the table cloth say it all.

Granny's Fried Chicken and Papa's Gravy

Granny’s Fried Chicken and Papa’s Gravy = Love

(You can see more pic’s in Johanna’s Comfort Food Sessions photo album on FB!)

Living Through Loss

Winter Sky

Winter Sky – Looking up through the trees in Washington Park, Portland Oregon.

It’s happened. You’ve lost a loved one. The relationship you thought was forever is over. The job you once loved so dearly is no more. Tragedy, personal or global. The major occurrence in your life you think will be the end of you. It won’t.

You will get over it. You will feel better. Life will be OK again. You will be happy. You will find joy in the memories. You will breathe freely with light and easy breaths. Your heart will sing. Your mind will be at ease. You will feel inspired and joyous. You will feel peace in your heart.

But, in the mean time…

Soothe yourself physically first. The shock of such a loss is hard on our hearts, minds and bodies. Begin to do the easiest things first. Move your body to take care of yourself. Breathe deeply, often. We rarely use our lungs to full capacity, instead we take shallow, shorter breaths. Notice your breathing rhythms and let yourself take slower, deeper, more cleansing breaths. Just doing this will also help slow your mind down and relax. Tell yourself you’ll think about it later. Right now, allow the energy in your body to move and flow on through with as much ease as you can.

As soon as is possible(and as often as you need to), put on your robe or most comfortable pj’s and straighten up your space. Light some candles and put on some soothing music. Sit in your most comfortable chair or lay down on the couch, get a blanket if you’re cold. Curl up or wrap your arms around yourself and breathe. Notice how your body is feeling. Lightly “check in” with your entire body. Start with your toes and work your way up.

Getting into your body and out of your head is the key short-cut.
When you “think” about what you feel, it/the feeling, never goes away.
When you feel what you feel, it can move rather quickly.

Allow yourself the sadness. Cry until you stop, and you will. Breathe into the grief (anger, hurt) you feel in your heart, stomach or throat. Feel where you feel it and breathe. Allow yourself to just physically feel the sensations in your body. When you feel yourself tightening your stomach, relax it and breathe. Just notice where the feelings are and also notice how the physical sensation moves when you focus on it. Feel the tightness relax and move up, notice the relief you feel after a big yawn. You are moving the energy. Let it take as long as it takes. If it’s quick, great. If it takes a while, no big deal. This was a big experience and you deserve your own loving kindness, care and compassion.

Give yourself a moment to fully experience your experience. Give yourself permission to feel every feeling you ever have without judgment. Intend now to consciously soothe yourself in the quiet of your own mind. Remind yourself it is all going to be ok and better than that, it’s perfect.

Life is always working out for you and just because you don’t understand this right now, doesn’t mean you won’t. It just means you need to allow yourself to be where you are in your experience. With experience comes knowledge.

It will all be clear one day. Relax in that knowing. The better you get at moving the energy physically in your body the quicker the clarity comes. It’s only our minds that tell us something is wrong. Our physical bodies are instruments of communication between ourselves and our source. Learn to control your mind (and it’s propensity to focus negatively) and your ability to hear, know and understand those communications increases exponentially.

I send so much Love and Many Blessings to each and every person struggling with loss today and every day. I am holding the vision for absolute happiness, health, vitality and peace in your heart. You are loved and supported more than you know.

Get Sad, Make A Decision

I wrote an article a while back called Get Mad, Make A Decision.  I wrote about finally getting tired of not getting what I wanted and making the decision to do something about it. Finally getting mad enough to say, “OK. I’ve had it. Something is changing NOW.”

What changes now is all up to you. Stop doing that thing that you know you do. Stop letting someone else be your excuse for you not having what you want. Decide what you want and head in that direction. No matter what anyone else says or thinks, this is your life, live it.

Sometimes you have to get mad before you’ll make a decision like that, but sometimes, something happens in your life that doesn’t make you mad, it makes you sad. Things happen in our lives that we don’t understand and from the very sad and hurt place we stand, the greater plan of our lives can be difficult, if not impossible to see. This is when we have to just be sad, and make a decision.

A little over 1 year ago, my sweet wiener dog, Zupe made his transition. He was sick for about a month before we knew it was time to let him go. During that month, we did everything we knew to do energetically and physically to heal and “save” our little dog, but in the end, it was his time. When it finally happened, we were exhausted and devastated. We tried so hard. We did everything we could do. (Some folks won’t understand loving a dog so much, it’s ok.) People have had the same experience with loved ones that have suffered too long. (Or maybe you’ve just lost a relationship or have found yourself at the end of something beautiful.)

I realized as we let Zupe go, that through his passing he was offering us a beautiful gift. Freedom. We all have this opportunity when something this big happens in our lives.

Decide now that you’re going to allow every bit of old energy that no longer serves and uplifts you to move. Let yourself grieve. For the loss of your loved one, for the pain you have suffered, for the hurt of everyone involved. Stay out of your head as much as possible during this time and only feel. Let yourself feel the physical feelings (the sick feeling in your stomach or the intense ache in your heart) of pain, sadness and grief in your body and let them move. Laugh every time you feel like it and rejoice that your loved one is laughing with you. Spend as much time outside in nature as you can and take good care of yourself. Be so kind, compassionate and loving to yourself. Soothe yourself in the quiet of your own mind when you begin to feel upset. Be your own best friend and cheerleader.

Allow yourself the time to feel everything. Don’t try to rush it or think you should already be feeling better. Remember that this too shall pass. One day the memories of your loved one will bring such pleasure and joy, rather than the loss you feel so deeply now.

Love is eternal.  These physical bodies are only a very small part of our whole being… our spirit is always in the non-physical. Death is a misconception. It’s only transition and they are never far away.

As I held Zupe to my chest before his transition, I felt him melt into my heart. I knew instinctively he’d always be there. Never parted from me, but certainly, always a part of me.

Celebrate the joy and freedom our friends and loved ones feel once they’ve made their transition.  Feel the exhilaration they feel being free from the vehicle that finally wore out. Talk to your loved ones daily and listen for the answer in your heart. Remember, when you are thinking about them, they are with you. Don’t feel the separation, feel the love. They are with us, always.

Homecoming / Coming Home

I’ve had some full circle moments lately.  I recently went home for my high school homecoming. It has been 21 years since I graduated from Jayton High School.  And for the first time since I was  a very young child, I wanted to go home.  I needed the comfort of my family.  I needed to know that the recent energy I was feeling (previously tied up with them) was indeed old and no longer existed in my life.

Beside feeling the comfort and ease of family and being in my child hood home, I was reminded of how big my home truly is.  I was raised and my family still lives on JD Patterson Ranch, between 2 small towns in Texas.  Returning for homecoming in a town of 513 people is pretty wild, the love and support is amazing.  Political differences, religious differences… no matter.  We all hugged and smiled and squeezed each other laughing.  We kids grew up together, and the elders watched me grow up and I love them, all of them. Then and now.

The other town over, Aspermont is where my mom and grand parents were raised and lived most of their lives.  Anytime we go back, we eat at Hickman’s, the cafe of my childhood.  (chicken fried steak, mashed potatoes, gravy, green beans, yeast rolls or garlic toast, old school salad bar… getting the picture!?? YUM.) As soon as I arrive in town, everyone recognizes me (because I look like my mother and my grandmother) and asks how they are.  Again, politics, religion, any difference at all… never mentioned.

It occurred to me on this trip how important having this community of familiar love and support has been in my life. I have 2 counties worth of folks that think I am pretty darn great and are always glad to see me and hug my neck. I see very clearly how people need it. I am well aware of the stability this network has provided me. Love and Support. I rarely see any of them (maybe once a year?) but they know me and love me and are there, with a smile on their faces whenever they think about me. And vice versa.

When I came home after the weekend.  I was again met with beautiful community.

I am recently rebuilding parts of my life. It feels so good to start fresh. Even if it’s a little scary at first, things always come around.  The unfamiliar can be most unsettling at times. But when I emailed my friends and family (some of which I’ve never seen in person, only spoken to on the phone or through email!) my new contact information and to tell them about this blog, my feeling of being home was even more palpable.  The love and support I have received has been overwhelming and I am more than thrilled at what life has in store for me.

Zupe

Alive and well in the NP. (non-physical!)

My sweet dog Zupe passed away 1 year ago on Oct 8th. He is ultimately what opened me up to the true nature of our lives and the beauty and wonder around us every day.  The energy I allowed to move with his passing flowered my full enlightenment.  The year that followed has been profound.  Vibrations that lay dormant in me (that no longer match my new reality) have come up and been felt.  Over and over again.  Situations I couldn’t believe.  Energy long since forgotten, back again for my feeling.  It didn’t always feel great, of course.  Because that is the way life is, and it’s ok.  I recognized at every turn myself moving old energy. Allowing the discomfort to wash over me and breathing through it.  Nothing to worry about. I’m not going to drown. I stand on solid ground. We all do.

So come home yourself.  To the knowing that all is truly well.

My life is exactly what I make of it.  No one creates in my life and reality. (Thank God!)

It’s just little ole me here.

Being excited about allowing more and more ease in my life and looking forward to sharing it all.

Much Love to you,
Crystal