You’ve Got To Hand It To Them: But They’ll Take It How They Take It

Check out my latest article, just posted on LinkedIn.We drove out to our favorite river spot yesterday. On the way we stopped at Rusty Rooster to pick up a snack of delicious fried chicken, just like my Granny used to make.

We shared a piece driving down the road…

A few bites into the chicken I handed the piece to Dionne in the way I felt she’d be able to hold it easily and get the best bite, but when she reached for it, she took it in a completely different way than I had handed it to her.

In that moment, I gained a level of clarity on so much of what we do that I had to share it with you.

They’ll take it how they take it.

This is true whatever message, product or service you’re sharing; business or personal. No matter the energy behind what you’re doing, the other person can only perceive that which is in their own vibration and matches their level of conscious awareness.

Years ago, I worked for a person that I loved dearly. I would feel such waves of appreciation for the work we were doing together, I’d be moved send a rave email. In it I’d share all the reasons I was so proud to be doing the work and happy to help and support in any way I could.

I remember on more than one occasion not getting the response I thought I’d get. This person read my heart bursting, absolutely open and loving message and took it the wrong way.

Instead of hearing what I was genuinely saying they took it as a sign I wanted more power, money or recognition. I would never have turned down more money, of course, but those were never my intentions. I was simply sharing my moment of joy and appreciation.

So what’s the solution?

How do we make sure our message falls on open ears and arrives with our true intention intact?

First, feel through the physical sensations of upset or irritation any misunderstanding might have caused. Where is it? In your heart, stomach, throat? Resist the need to explain or defend yourself. They couldn’t hear you anyway. Recognize the other person is receiving this information through their own level of consciousness and no amount of research or hard facts will change their mind in the moment.

We all view the world through the very personal lenses of our positive or negative encounters. Our deepest fears and worries are what cloud our daily life experience. Move through this discomfort physically in your body to align your energy with those that can hear your message and will resonate with your business or service. You aren’t trying to reach everyone, just the ones that need what you’re offering.

Appreciate these ‘outages’ in the moment for the good information they are. Learn to acknowledge the upset you’re feeling physically as the thing keeping you from your perfect alignment. Let yourself feel through it without judgment or justification (or the stories of WHY you’re upset to begin with) and you’ll get even more clear about what you want to say or share or even how you need to re-direct your focus and efforts.

When we begin to recognize bad feelings or momentary “misses” as actual opportunities to move ourselves closer to what we want, then there’s never a problem, merely another potential solution.

Finding Your Flow

Have you ever been presented with an opportunity that obviously worked well for others but you immediately assumed was no good? Or maybe it felt good in the beginning but soon your mind had you convinced that it was a mistake and wouldn’t work out.

In each of these situations we have the opportunity to feel through our initial response to get to the truth of the matter for ourselves. Not what someone else thinks is right, but what WE feel is right for US.

What works for you won’t necessarily work for others and vice versa.

If you’re not connecting with your ideal client or customer, where’s the outage? Is it the way you feel about your offering or the way you feel about presenting or sharing your information?

Either way is no problem. By first being aware of what’s happening you have the opportunity to make adjustments, but they’re not the adjustments you might think.

More important than SEO, content marketing or Facebook ads, aligning your energy to feel good about what you’re doing is paramount to having a successful business. When you are in alignment, advertising is just icing on the cake. Word of mouth will become your greatest advertising tool and any money spent on marketing and ads will yield a higher ROI.

You can still do what you do, but you’ll be doing it in a way that reaches the people you are most excited to help and they will be happy to have found you.

What are the obstacles you bump up against on a regular basis? Where do you physically carry your anxiety, upset, irritation or grief?

When you realize this powerful and important information is available to you right now you can utilize it to create the shift and momentum you need for living the life you’ll love. You don’t have to do it like everyone else. You just have to do it the way that works best for you.

What do you think? If you’re reaching your target audience easily, what are your best tips? If you aren’t, what do you feel is standing in your way?

_________________________________________________________________

Crystal Nuding is a leading edge thinker and stress management expert whose message of soothing and uplifting has helped people around the world. With no religious or spiritual affiliation, she encourages personal fulfillment through self acceptance and empowerment helping people release themselves from suffering, struggle and self-limiting beliefs. https://crystalnuding.com/about-crystal/

Perspective is Everything.

My perspective - Straight Up (through the trees at Hoyt Arboretum)

My perspective – Straight Up (through the trees at Hoyt Arboretum, Portland OR)

per·spec·tive

/pərˈspektiv/
noun: perspective

A particular attitude toward or way of regarding something; a point of view.

The thing about life is this…. you get what you expect.

If you have a great outlook and positive attitude, it’s likely you’re pretty happy in your life. You expect things to work out for you and they usually do. Maybe not in the way you first thought you wanted, but ultimately you realize that what has happened is actually better than what you’d previously hoped for. Life is like that.

If you are negatively focused and cynical, life is probably a bitch and then you’ll die. You expect things to be irritating and annoying and they usually are. The jerk at the drive through gave you the wrong order, you’re always driving behind some other jerk on the highway and all the people you work with are idiots. No one ever does their part so that you can do yours and you usually end up having to do it all because that’s just your luck. You’re the only person that knows and does it right so you get stuck doing it. Life is like that.

“The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile universe.”

― Albert Einstein

You get what you expect, think about most often and focus on.

It’s simple.

Your perspective creates your reality.

If you think the world is out to get you, it is.

If you think the world is loving and supporting you, it is.

That’s why everyone’s lives are so different. Have you noticed how members of the same family can be so different? Raised in the same home with much of the same environmental triggers but some turn out happy, healthy or wealthy while others are unhappy, sick or poor.

We personally create our own reality whether we are aware of it or not.

If you find yourself being stuck in negative loops of bad service, poor health, liars and cheats, poverty, abuse, judgment or neglect, take a deep breath and relax. Maybe you have plenty of money or the relationship of your dreams but you’re still not happy, you take a deep breath too. All truly is well and you can have what you want.

It may be difficult for you to believe at first, but it’s quite easy to change once you know how to do it.

Give yourself the happiest, healthiest, most loving and abundant life you can imagine by noticing and releasing destructive habits of thought; Keep reaching for that better feeling perspective.

How do you find a better perspective?

First, you have to release the old energy that makes you think the crappy perspective you have now is the only one.

When you’re in the middle of a crisis or bad situation, the energy of it is flowing mightily through your body. Learn to let that energy (of things not being what you want) move through without holding on to it and your fresh new perspective presents itself.

You can absolutely do it for yourself, but lots of folks need some help. I’m here to empower you to live the life you want. It’s absolutely available to you.

All my love,
Crystal

Create the life you want in 2014 – Sessions with Crystal

Results, damnit!

Love is all around if you're looking for it.

Love is all around if you’re looking for it.

Bless our human hearts. We all want results.

We want to see immediately the results of our actions. I’ve started a diet and want to see a lower number on the scale and a new rear-end in the mirror on the second day. Or we have gotten really out of balance and have a dis-ease or diagnosis that should be cleared up with one pill.

Well, again, bless our human hearts.

We are hard wired to want those results. We don’t necessarily want to do the work it would take to get those results, we just want the results. Although the “work” we truly need to do to get the results we want isn’t “work” at all.

Sometimes we like the exercise or workouts we do and some of us even like to eat healthy foods, but as a society we’ve given every ounce of our own personal power away to big pharma, doctors, politicians, banks and the media.

We aren’t really willing to go through a process of healing or transformation. We just want it right now. But your illness or dire situation didn’t happen over night, it may sometimes seem as though it did, but I assure you it didn’t. It started a while ago and built up little by little until it got so loud that you were diagnosed with cancer or your partner left you or you lost your job.

There were little warning signs all along the way that if you knew and were paying attention you could have listened to and made adjustments to create a totally different outcome. Learn how to navigate these signals and you’ll never be caught off guard again.

So, ok… I get it. You want results.  What is the one result you can always look for that will make everything better? And I do mean everything.

re·lief
noun: relief

~ a feeling of reassurance and relaxation following release from anxiety or distress.

Ahhhhh, sweet relief.

If the result you are looking for is relief, everything in your life changes. Relief isn’t complete and total resolution, relief is feeling just a little bit better than you were before.

If you stop looking for the whole enchilada right now and appreciate the relief from your busy mind or a slight bit of relief in your body if illness or some diagnosis is what you’re in search of then you’re on your way.

So many times when faced with an illness or terrible situation the only thing people want is immediate, complete healing or resolution and nothing else will do. When that’s your standard, you’re not leaving yourself much room for improvement. You’re also not giving yourself the opportunity to discover what put you on that path to begin with. But, if you let just feeling a little bit better be enough it begins to compound.

Beginning to recognize where this illness or situation came from is quite helpful. Noticing where you’ve been directing your thoughts and focus can give you great information on how you’ve gotten yourself into any situation.

I know some people might not want to hear they had anything to do with their illness or dire situation, but taking responsibility for your own life, health and happiness is the only way to control it. Otherwise, you’re at the mercy of the outside world and that just sucks.

So, how do I get relief when things are so terrible in my life right now?

Well, begin with breathing. Stop what you’re doing and take a few deep breaths. In through your nose, filling your belly first and then your chest, then breathe out, pulling in your stomach to empty out your lungs completely before the next deep cleansing breath.

While you’re breathing begin to soothe yourself in your mind. Say calming and comforting things to yourself, even if at first you don’t believe them to be true. “I’m OK. I’m OK. It’s all OK. This is all going to be alright. Everything is working out for me. Even if I can’t see it, I know that things are working out for me.”

Get outside in nature. Take a walk with your pet or borrow someones pet (ask them first! haha) to take for regular walks. Play music that makes you feel good and dance around. Light some candles and put on comfy clothes. What makes you feel good?

By taking the time to make yourself feel better physically you’re giving your mind a chance to follow. You know how hard it is to be positive when you feel bad physically. If your problem IS feeling bad physically you must begin to take notice of feeling just a tiny bit better. Baby steps make all the difference.

Once you begin to get the hang of it, you’re golden. With enough practice, you’ll begin to believe what you’re saying and feel it to be true. You’ll also begin to hear the crazy shit your mind is telling you as crazy shit and won’t be so frightened by it.

You’ll notice how when you calm and soothe yourself, you don’t stay upset for so long, you have better ideas, your illness begins to respond to the treatment, you have more fun with your children, partner or spouse and life in general just gets better and better.

This is all so very simple, but not always easy. If you need support on your journey, I am here to assist and guide you.

You can do it. You know what your heart needs to hear. Say those things and begin cultivating a relationship with yourself based on soothing and support. Life really is good and fun and all you need to do to experience more of that is look for and give yourself relief.

Here’s to you finding it.

My love to you,

Crystal

Easy Does It

Let life be easy.

Let life be easy.

Does life run pretty smoothly or are you always asking yourself, “Why do I have to struggle and fight for everything I have!?”

I spent quite a few years of my own life asking that question. Along with… “Why can’t things be easier for me?”

Fortunately, asking myself those questions helped move me toward an easier life.

After reading Florence Scovel Shinn’s books in my early twenties, I knew what she said was true. We really are guiding our own lives with our words, thoughts and deeds.

It’s interesting, isn’t it, that we hold struggle in such high regard? Have you noticed?

If someone tells you something was easy for them do you immediately think, “well, so what?” or “Of course it was easy for you, everything is easy for you. Jerk” If it was easy, we don’t want or need to hear about it. Tell me what you struggled with and how much crap you had to take and dish-out and wrestle through to get somewhere and I’ll listen. And then I’ll engage you with my stories of struggle and hardship because that is what makes me worthy… my struggle.

Well, I’m here to share a little secret with you.

Life is supposed to be easy.

I know. I know. Some part of your body jumped up and said, “HEY!!! You’re wrong. No fair. I’m struggling and don’t know how not to so you better be struggling too.”

Have you noticed how some people don’t want to hear about or talk to happy people? They’d rather commiserate and complain with you than hear about your triumphs, particularly if your wins came easily without a heavy price. We all want to experience that ease but often feel angry or irritated that it’s out of our reach when someone else demonstrates it.

If you share too much of your easy and happy life you’ll notice some folks around you grumbling, perhaps rolling their eyes at you and mouthing smart ass comments. Bless them, though. Don’t be mad. They don’t even realize what they’re doing.

Bringing more awareness into our lives is the key to letting things be easier. Just notice when you get frustrated hearing about your friends recent engagement, raise or job opportunity.  Don’t be mad at them for having the success OR upset with yourself for feeling less than enthusiastic. Realize you’re just doing what a huge portion of society is doing and let it go. When you begin to be aware of these feelings and physical sensations you can allow them to shift and change the way your own life works.

The problem was this… We’ve been lead to believe that the glory is in the struggle. And for a while, because life was so much more difficult for our parents and grandparents, it was necessary to find and appreciate the glory in the struggle. That was all we knew and making the best of a bad situation was the best we could do.

But, times have changed and our understanding of how the world actually works has changed. We can no longer(though most do) view the world through Newton’s Principia (Mathematical Principles of Natural Philosophy, originally published in 1687).

Classic Newtonian physics posits that everything is deterministic, but quantum physics has proven that nothing is.

Everything is changing, always. And most importantly it’s changing (or not) due to your observation, thoughts and words.

So… Easy does it.

If you don’t understand all of this quantum physics no worries. Just think about the last time you got a new car and then saw them everywhere on the road. I once rented a vehicle that I was unfamiliar with (can’t even remember now what it was… small SUV, H something or other) and the moment I drove away from the car rental place, I saw them everywhere.

Read Pam Grout’s book E-Squared to learn more about how your thoughts create your reality.

When you recognize the truth in all of this and need guidance on how to allow your life to be what you’ve always wanted, I am here for you. Beside focusing on what you want and using your thoughts to move you closer to that, I teach you how to find and feel the energy in your body that allows life to shift quickly and easily.

Purchase a set of 3 sessions today for yourself or someone you know and love.

Find out today how easy life can be.

Much Love to you,

Crystal

Blessings & Beliefs

Many blessings for compassionate cooperation

Many blessings for compassionate cooperation

People are mad these days. Mad as hell and don’t want to take it any more. I say, good. Be mad. But then let it go.

Allow yourself to move through that energy and notice how you can shift the circumstances around you by not engaging. And even better than not engaging, how about blessing the person or situation you’re mad at?

I’ve had sessions this past week or so with folks angry, irritated or disgusted by either an individual or group of people. I can totally relate. We’ve all felt those less than warm and fuzzy feelings before and it’s absolutely OK.

Every feeling you have ever felt in your entire life is valid.

Those feelings were your natural reaction to the situation, given everything you’ve lived up to that point. So take a deep breathe and relax. It is OK and you are right to feel how you feel. But that doesn’t mean it can’t change.

We live in a society that wants to make us feel bad for how we feel.

“You shouldn’t feel that way!” “That’s not Christian of you to feel that way.” “That’s not the way I feel, you’re wrong.”

Any of these sound or feel familiar? Of course they do.

If we can’t understand and get frustrated when someone doesn’t like tomatoes or hates walnuts in their brownies, what do you think the reaction will be around subjects with deeper meaning like religion or politics?

We all believe what we believe. Beliefs are merely thoughts we think over and over again. We all think our beliefs are true, but they aren’t. Not necessarily. Unfortunately, some of our beliefs don’t serve us or anyone at all. Some of our beliefs are completely untrue.

We’re not taught to believe things by our parents or teachers by them saying… “Ok, kids! Pay attention. Today, I will teach you to believe ________.”

That didn’t happen.

What did happen was as children we were little sponges.

Our parents raised us and our preachers and teachers taught us like we were only listening to their words. Ha! Bless all of our hearts. I’m sure you can relate from your own experience the truth in this. We’ve all heard, “Do as I say, not as I do.” Guess what folks, it doesn’t work that way.

What we(ALL of us) as children did was pick up on the vibration, the attitude and the underlying meaning of why “they” did what they did. And filtering that through our own short life experiences, beliefs began to form in our little child minds.

Beliefs like…. “Women are supposed to take care of the house and children. Men don’t do dishes or housework. Girls have to be skinny, pretty and nice to get a husband. Boys have to work hard and make lots of money to get a girl. Women are supposed to make everything better. Daddies don’t stick around. I wasn’t good enough for them to love me. I have to be perfect all the time and never make mistakes. Men don’t respect women and think they are hysterical. Women have to take care of and protect themselves because men are neanderthals.”

Children grow up and learn how to treat people and how to allow people to treat them by watching their parents. Is their father kind, loving and respectful to their mother? Does their mother have her own power or does she always defer to father but then blow up and be angry with the children? Girls and boys learn much about the rules of society in their own homes. Whether kindness and compassion or impatience and abuse, they are affected by the circumstances around them.

What if they(we as children) saw and heard parents blessing their enemies?

What if children saw more kindness, gentleness and compassion in their homes? Not only the compassion that parents had for friends and loved ones, but also patience and compassion for people they disagreed with or didn’t appreciate. What change might that bring about?

How can you begin to bless the people that irritate or frustrate you most? Without making huge sweeping moves, what small ways can you begin to bless everyone around you.

What do you think would happen if everyone took a moment to say. “I really can’t stand this person, but wow, they must be suffering to act like that. Or what must they have been through to be like that? Bless their heart.” And then say, bless my heart for having to deal with them. Let yourself feel and move the energy around the situation while giving yourself and the opposing party a break.

Who can you send blessings to today that you have profound judgements about?

What you do for others, you do for yourself. When you judge, curse and demean others you’re doing it to yourself. When you bless them, you bless yourself.

Give it a shot. When you take time for prayer or meditation today, whatever that looks like for you, send blessings to those you don’t care for or understand.

You will be surprised at the level of peace you can achieve when you stop raging against what you don’t like and start cultivating more compassion for what you don’t understand.

I would never do what I see many people around me doing every day, but I’m not mad at them about it. My heart sees the suffering in their heart and I have deep compassion for them. Does it always come easily, no. Many times I have to feel through my own anger and judgement about the situation, but I always understand it is that, my OWN anger, fear or judgement.

Even people in positions of authority(doctors, teachers, pastors, politicians, lawyers) have issues. You have issues, your parents had issues, their parents had issues. Get over it. Stop judging others by their issues and recognize you have your own. Take a deep breath and give everyone a break(yourself included.) When you accept your feelings as your own and stop blaming others, life gets really good.

It’s not always easy, but it’s very simple.

Bless your heart, bless their heart, bless all of our hearts. Everything really is OK. We’re all going to get through this and life will be even better because of it.

Seeing and holding the vision of compassion and cooperation in all areas of our lives.

Sending much love and many blessings to all of you.

I’m here if you need some help.
Crystal

You’re In Control

Bus in de schemering

Photo by Gerard Stolk

You’re driving this bus, so drive it!

By the way, this bus… is your LIFE.

If you need to slow down, slow the hell down. If you need to make a turn, put on your turn signal and check your rear view mirrors.

Stop complaining about what’s wrong. Stop telling everyone the bad news. Stop spouting and sharing statistics that don’t support and uplift people. Find something good and appreciate it.

What do you want?

What area’s of your life would you like more control?

What parts of your world would you like to see changed?

Don’t know? Well think about it.

Oh, you do know? Great. Pick your whole self up and proceed in that direction.

Instead of walking around kicking the dirt acting like you just get what this mean ol’ world gives you, stand up and start moving yourself in the direction you want to go.

No one has control over you.

You get what you focus on whether you want it or not, so start noticing what you are giving your focused attention to.

Need help figuring it all out? That’s why I’m here.

Life is much easier than most of us allow it to be. (We do so love to hear ourselves bitch.)

There’s an easy way around that. I’m here to help.

Take the wheel folks. You’re already driving. Don’t you want to get better at getting what you want?

I’ve got the directions to Easy Street.

I’ll be here when you’re ready.

All my love,
Crystal

PS… Thanks for the great photo Gerard!

It’s Easier Than That

More alignment, less labor

More alignment, less labor

On this Labor Day, I’ve got some good news for you. Whatever you’re struggling with right now(money,job,health,relationship), the solution is available. Whatever you’re imagining needs to happen to resolve the issue, I’m here to tell you, it’s easier than that.

Our minds are currently wired to look for what’s wrong in any given situation, but, not to worry, it’s only a habit. We actually live in a vast and miraculous universe and what you need is already available, and it’s easier than you think. Someone has already figured it out and the solution is available right now, just waiting for you to find it.

Most of us spend too much time participating in our habit of poking at and talking about problems. How did this happen? What was the cause? Where did it start? Let’s get to the bottom of this!

So many people think they must focus on the problem and worry about it until it resolves… because, if I’m not worried, it means I don’t care, right? WRONG.

This is the way many of us were taught to handle such things. Grab the bull by the horns and wrestle that sucker to the ground. Or if I don’t know how to do that, worrying and planning for the worst will be my modus operandi. The original problem may well resolve, but the continued focus on and wrestling with it brings another situation right on it’s heels that will sting in much the same way.

What if there’s a simple solution?

What if it’s easier than I think?

How good will my life feel when I let things be easy?

How good will it feel to be genuinely, positively expectant?

How amazing will my life be when I realize there’s always an easy solution?

First, feel the ease of the previous questions. You don’t have to immediately answer the questions, just let your mind ponder them. Doesn’t that feel better than asking yourself what terrible thing could happen next?

Now, let yourself let it be easy. Begin expecting to find solutions more quickly and easily. Feel through any old feelings(physical sensations in your body) that says “things are hard, there’s honor in struggle or things come by easily aren’t worth much.”

Move the energy behind those old worn out thoughts and your mind more effortlessly reaches for positivity. And once your mind begins reaching for positivity everything changes. You get in the flow of life and things you want and need show up easily for you, right on time.

Once you get the hang of it, your life becomes completely your own. You’ll never really worry about anything again. Of course there will be those moments, there will always be moments, such is life. Relax and breathe and tell yourself, “You’re OK. You’re OK. We’re OK. This is OK. It’s easier than that. I love you. We’re absolutely love and supported. Thank goodness everything is always working out for us.”

With your own love, compassion and support, you can’t lose. All you ever need to completely change your world is your own self support,

So, when you find yourself struggling over a problem, relax. Spending your life in your head thinking about the troubles you’ve endured or witnessed only keeps you bound to those feelings and situations. Take a deep breathe, relax and remember that it’s much easier than you think.

I’m here to help. Contact me to schedule your phone or skype session. I look forward to hearing from you!

Sending all my love, soothing, peace, ease and flow,
Crystal

Skip It

Great song, I didn't skip it!

Great song, I didn’t skip it!

By now, I’m sure most folks have had some experience with Pandora Radio or the like. Rather than watching the news, ridiculous reality TV or whatever crap might be on at any given moment, (while simultaneously being forced to endure countless erectile dysfunction/depression medication commercials that blast at three times the volume of the program) we choose to listen to music.

A few of my favorite features on Pandora are also important in my every day life. Thumbs up, thumbs down and skip it.

  • If I like(or love) a song, I give it the ol’ thumbs up. Pandora get’s the message that I like that particular song and gives me more like it.
  • If I don’t like the song (or hate it!), I just click the thumbs down. No problem. Hey, Pandora, I don’t like that one.
  • Then, my favorite of all. I don’t like the song or want something different? I just click… Skip it.

That’s it. Done. Moving on. I don’t like that song. I’m in the mood for something different. I don’t call Pandora and tell them to take the song down. I don’t tell anyone. I don’t get mad. I don’t justify why I don’t want it. I just skip it.

What if we all lived our lives this way? What if instead of pushing against everything you don’t like or judge as bad/wrong you just skipped it?

When it’s obvious you don’t like or want what you’ve seen… Great. Duly noted. Nothing more to do. From this point any fighting, shouting, justifying or defending only adds energy to the very thing you disapprove of. Even the most well intentioned post/conversation to “spread the word” about the terrible injustice only strengthens and gives it more power.

So, what do you do when faced with something frustrating, irritating, scary, worrisome or horrible. Breathe. Relax and take big deep breaths. Let the physical sensation accompanying the upset flow through your body until you feel the relief. You will feel relief. It’s natural for this energy to move and flow.

Now, immediately turn your attention and thoughts to what you would prefer. Just like your focus on the negative brings you more like it, when you focus on what you want, that grows as well. You get more and more of whatever it is you focus on, whether you like it or not. So, doesn’t it make sense to focus on what pleases you and makes you feel good and happy?

All governments being responsible and fair. The news media focusing on the much larger picture of what’s right in our magnificent world. Religions of the world actually doing good works rather than converting or condemning. Every human being recognizing they alone hold the power in their lives.

What is your true hearts desire?

How could you more easily focus on that?

What if you stopped looking at the world in terms of what you like and don’t like and just noticed what is?

What will your life be like when you move quickly past what’s wrong and focus easily on what would be better?

If you don’t like it, let yourself skip it. It’s only our attention to things that keep them swirling around in our lives. No worries, though! All it takes is the recognition of how to do it and a bit of practice. I’m here to help.

Seeing your absolute freedom to fully enjoy your life!

All my Love,
Crystal

Busting Out

Crystal Laughing

We all need and do “bust out” from time to time. The thought of our friends becoming new parents makes my heart feel like it will bust out of my chest. Perhaps the job you loved for so long is no longer a match so it’s time to bust out. Maybe we’re busting out because our work project is complete or school is out and it’s time for much needed ease and relief.

Whatever the reason for your last “bust out”, you can see and probably even FEEL the release and relief of busting out. Extracting yourself from a place or feeling that doesn’t seem big enough for you anymore. Something you can’t contain or keep restrained any longer. Busting out, while sometimes uncomfortable, will set you free.

I grew up out in the country on a huge ranch in between two small Texas towns. The people there are good as gold, with hearts the size of our great state, but the minds around there could use a little opening. I’m sure they’d disagree, but I’m a bit different.

Growing up there, you didn’t even realize what a huge world there was outside of our little slice of it. You spend your childhood and young adult life hearing and doing the same things as everyone else around you, not because you wanted to, just because that’s what you did. Most everyone dressed the same and listened to the same music.

We had new kids come in from far away places(like California, ha!) and I would immediately feel sorry for them. They thought they had landed in po-dunk hell. In some ways they had, in others, it was heaven.

I loved growing up and living there, and even today I still love that that is how and where I grew up. So many things I am, know and do are because of my life in that small place, but there is much more to life and me(and you).

What we learn from our parents, communities and society growing up is just that, what we learn, what they knew to teach us, what they knew about life up to that point. But life goes on and we all keep learning.(hopefully)

Folks from my home town do many things… work in the oil field, in schools, they are teachers, coaches and administrators, they are business men and women, parents, stay-at-home moms, and more than a few cowboys. These are all expected, respected, acceptable and appreciated “jobs.”

But how does it work if what you do or your life path doesn’t look exactly like everyone else? What if you have thoughts and feelings that don’t match what everyone else is thinking and feeling? What if your idea of success doesn’t look like what you’ve been taught success looks like? What if your family/friends/community think you need to be, do or have things you don’t really care about? What if they think what you do is a scam or crazy?

Only one thing to do.

Bust. Out.

First let me assure you that you are perfect, absolutely perfect, right now and that everything is absolutely working out for you. The ultimate beauty of this magnificent world we live in is diversity. Variety is the spice of life. It’s what keeps things interesting. Living the life you were meant to live is the most important thing you will ever do for yourself and the world.

You can’t live your life for everyone else forever. Actually, some can and do. If you love it, do it, otherwise stop and do what you love. It’s up to each of us to determine what we want and what will make us happy. If you’re spending all of your time trying to make sure you’re doing things others will approve of you’re missing out on your own true hearts desires.

I lived much of my younger life doing what someone else told me to do. Parents, teachers, bosses and two husbands all to varying degrees determined my existence. Doing what I was told to do and/or what I knew others expected of me was my way of life. It was only after realizing how miserable I was that began to see I didn’t want the same things as everyone else. And that was OK.

Feeling like an alien in your family or community is actually not a bad thing. Take a big step back and have a look at the values, attitudes, ideals and behaviors of the people you feel separated from, do you agree with them? Often times you won’t, and that will be the reason you feel the separateness.

Appreciate everyone and everything that has brought you to right here and now. Know that from right where you are, you can go where ever you want. And this requires absolutely no change on anyone else’s part. They are perfect just the way they are, too.

When we get this concept and begin to appreciate everyone in our lives for their perfect role in shaping who we have and will become, we are amazingly free. No one can ever offend or upset us again.

Learning to live with other people not appreciating or respecting what you do, who you are or how you do things can be an interesting journey. But,ultimately the most rewarding and important journey we’ll ever take.

One day you’ll realize what other people think doesn’t matter and you’ll find yourself giggling. You’ll laugh and laugh about all the times you worried about what someone else might think. Hilarious.

Set your intention now to discover the real you. Intend to truly know who you are, what you do and your benefit to others/society. Many people from your “original tribe” might not really get it or you and that’s OK.

I’m sure you are well aware how people feel about things they don’t understand… many times fearful or dismissive. But, that’s not about you. It’s about them. Bless them and move on.

So, here’s to busting out in whatever way feels best to you. Here’s to you finding your own clearest, strongest voice and the courage to use it.

Find your niche, spread your wings and soar. The world needs more and more people like you… being truly, authentically, happily who you are.

Sending all my love and many blessings. I’m here to help.

Crystal

Focus Forward

ThroughTheTrees - San Marcos River

As you give thought to your future—your future that may be 10 years; your future that may be 5 years; or your future that is 60 days away—you literally begin pre-paving. And then, as you move into those pre-paved moments, and as that future becomes your present, you fine-tune it by saying, This, is what I now want. And all of those thoughts that you have put forth about your future, right down to this moment when you are now intending what action you want to take, will all fit together to bring you precisely that which you now want to live.

— Abraham
Excerpted from the book “The Law of Attraction, The Basics of the Teachings of Abraham”

I absolutely loved this Abraham quote. When we are in difficult situations or faced with ugly truths we tend to focus on the right now circumstances of our lives. Which, in moments of joy and happiness is great, but when things don’t look the way you want them to, can be painful to bear. In these hard times, the only thing to do is focus forward.

Think about how good it will feel just a few days, weeks or months from now when everything is as you’d like it to be.

Plan on it, say to yourself and everyone you know and love, “No worries, it’s all coming.” And then start imagining what it will look like when it gets here. Don’t allow yourself to stay focused on what you don’t want. Take a deep breath, relax and know it will work out. It can be hard for us to believe that our minds don’t always have the right answers and that sometimes(most times) until you are consciously focusing on what you want, it actually makes things worse.

Your focus on how you want it to be is the most important thing you can do
to bring about the results you want.

Give yourself the chance to create what you want instead of repeating old scenarios again and again. Let the last time be the last time and move on. No worries. No big deal. That’s how we previously did things, but we’re doing this now.

We think over 70,000 thoughts per day and the majority of those thoughts are the same as yesterday. Focusing forward moves yourself closer to what you actually do want.

When you allow what’s wrong to just flow by you(through your life experience) without fanfare, it doesn’t stick around. The situation will pass and you will be more aware of what you’d prefer to happen next time.

But, when we shout about it, fight about it, blog about it, Facebook it, Tweet it, think about it and discuss it with multiple friends and family members, it can’t help but repeat itself. And then you get to say, “See, I told you so. I knew this was going to happen. This always happens.”

But is that what you really want? No, it’s not. You may think it makes you feel better to “vent”, but you’re only hurting yourself(and the person that has to listen to it). Give yourself 5 minutes with one person to bitch about whatever you need to bitch about and then be done with it.

You want peace, ease, wellness, happiness, relief, health, harmony, joy, excitement, abundance, satisfaction, fulfillment… am I on the right track? Thought so.

Don’t ask why or what else could go wrong? Why only gets you more wrapped up in the trouble at hand and what else is creatively asking for more of what you don’t want.

If you want something different to happen in your world, you’ve got to begin to think differently. Allow yourself to feel through whatever comes up in your moment of upset, but begin to change the way you think about problems… Interesting situation. I wonder how this is going to work out in my favor? Forget that problems even exist. Forget them. Think about the solutions.

Focus forward with these questions. Don’t try to answer them. Just ask and let the universe deliver.

  • What is my true hearts desire?
  • How will it feel when I’ve gotten what I wanted?
  • How can it be easier?
  • Who could help?
  • How can I allow myself to allow more help?
  • How good will I feel when I’ve allowed the easiest solution?
  • How much easier will my life be when I think only in terms of solutions?
  • How fun and exciting will it be when I no longer see life’s problems as problems?

Now, just start making a note of everything that is working out for you. Make a list of things you want and start watching for them to show up.

Keep living your life and doing what you need to do, just notice when coincidences happen or synchronicities show up. Take them as cues that you’re on the right track and let it encourage you to keep your focus on the end result.

If you need help letting go of some old scenarios(heartache/heartbreak/anger/guilt/shame/resentment), I’m here to help. Don’t let your past steal your joyous now. Let that go and live your life.

Life is good and fun and it’s supposed to be easy. We’ve been brainwashed into thinking that struggle is honorable. While those who struggled before us certainly deserve their honor, we don’t have to struggle any more.

Life is easier than we let it be. I can help you let it be easy.

Much Love to you,
Crystal